Pain

Feeling hurt is our bodies way of letting us know that something needs to change. Whether it’s physical or emotional pain, that hurt is your indication that something needs to be done. When it’s physical that’s easier, see a doctor for assessment and treatment options. When it’s emotional: good luck. Healing that hurt can take an entire lifetime.

In the psych community there’s push for medications and talk therapy to aid in emotional healing. While both and even a combination of the two can be helpful, it all comes down to you in the end. You have to put in the work to heal those emotional wounds. No pill or psych professional will magically cure you, they’re assets on the journey at best. If you have the misfortune to connect with a ‘professional’ who looks down on mental illness then you’re in a new world of struggles. This is why developing a relationship with your provider(s) is important.

Rapport doesn’t appear over night, like any relationship it takes time to get to know a person. It may help to meet with a provider who has a positive reputation with other patients although their interactions with others does not guarantee a favorable interaction with you. The most important part of therapy is honesty, you have to be truthful for a therapist to be helpful and most of us require a degree of trust before we’ll share the darker parts of ourself.

I have personally seen many providers and even had my share of time in psychiatric wards (which I do not recommend). What I have found as a person dealing with mental illness is that the Hospital protocol for psych patients is to treat us like we’re crazy. We are confined and stripped of worldly possessions in a facility where no one is predictable or stable. To a degree this is necessary because all psych struggles vary. As a patient, this has never helped me.

What psychiatric wards taught me was that pretending to be ok will give you back your freedom. Shove that pain deeper down so the nurses will tell the doctors you’re improving and you can go home. At least at home the pervasive thoughts can be chased with delicious snacks or television shows to distract. On the ward, everything is communal and everyone is struggling with demons they couldn’t hide anymore.

The healthcare system around psychological patients has so much to be desired. I’ve wanted to join the forces of professionals to help hurting souls and as I get older I just want to be left alone. I cannot deal with my own things, how can I help others deal with theirs? Oh right, blog daily about feelings and healing, hopefully it lands for someone.

Be well, sweet souls. 💛

If you identify with the neurodivergent community, would appreciate an adult space with a focus on support and betterment, I’d like to invite you to check out my discord server! Where shame, blame and devaluation are discouraged while compassion and personal growth are encouraged. The server is designated mature (18+) and minors are promptly removed. Multiple categories allow Members to decide what sort of content they’d like to see from the server using selections in the #about-you channel after joining. You’re invited!