“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can break my spirit.” That’s how that saying could have gone to be more accurate. Our words have meaning even if we think they’re meaningless. We never know what another person is going through or what they’ve endured and that’s why choosing words of kindness is an act of compassion for the human condition.
We are all struggling in ways we may never share. A person who chooses to shame or blame others for differences has a direct correlation to their unhealed hurt inside. Healed and contented people do not try to tear others down for any reason. Hurtful and devaluing language is an act of desperation to feel superior. I’m sure everyone can relate with saying something you cannot take back after it’s said. This is why it’s important to pause before we act.
When we practice mindful living and paying acute attention to how we interact in the world we become aware. It’s in awareness of a need for change that we can begin changing. Learning how to speak to yourself with kindness is a monumental lesson to learn. When we choose words of care and support of our own success in life then we begin to find more success in life.
If we are focused more on tearing others down to feel like we’re ahead it’s a hamster wheel of negativity. While putting another down may briefly feel superior, causing harm to others creates a mutual resentment. It serves as a poison to well-being. The person afflicted by your verbal abuses will lose care and respect for you and your choice to inflict hurt is a display of your lack of care and respect for them.
We can be disappointed in people or situations without belittling them. Shame, blame and devaluation do not serve anyone. The momentary sense of superiority is a lie that wounded souls want to believe because it feels better than their unhealed pains. Healing is not easy, it is important. How we speak to our Self is a good place to start.
How do you speak to yourself when you make a mistake? If the answer is shame, blame or devaluation (idiot, fucked it up again, etc) then speaking to others this way is to be expected. How we treat others is a direct reflection of our personal self respect and self love. Our words have meaning, pay attention to what you’re saying.
Be well, sweet souls. 💛
If you identify with the neurodivergent community, would appreciate an adult space with a focus on support and betterment, I’d like to invite you to check out my discord server! Where shame, blame and devaluation are discouraged while compassion and personal growth are encouraged. The server is designated mature (18+) and minors are promptly removed. Multiple categories allow Members to decide what sort of content they’d like to see from the server using selections in the #about-you channel after joining. You’re invited!